I am supposedly in the marriageable age and many of my friends are getting engaged/married. Well, here is a post that address all such married or to-be-married people.
It's perfectly OK to expect many things out of your marriage to your spouse. You get a hand to hold on when you're weak or cold or lonely perhaps, you get a shoulder to lean on, you get laps to lie on and so on...
A relationship is not a gold mine from which you can keep extracting good things out. It would eventually run dry until you keep adding something to it.
So what is that you should give? What is the priority need?
Your partner's smile is your priority. Give anything or everything to keep happiness glowing on your spouse's face.
Let me explain how this would ensure internal stability to this system !
Ben and Bella are married. (Names are randomly chosen by chance. Any references to real persons are purely unintentional and coincidental !!). Ben gets fired by his boss. He comes home furious. He vents out his frustration at home. Bella gets offended. She screams at the top of her voice. And that's like a match stick thrown on a dry forest. A forest fire ensures!
Ben and Bella. Ben gets fired by his boss again. (Poor Ben :-p ). He comes home furious. He vents out his frustration at home. Bella gets offended. But her priority is her spouse's smile. She remains cool. She pacifies him. She encourages him. She makes him feel better. Ben feels good. He smiles... And then... :-)
Well, real life situations may be tougher than this. But is never impossible.
COMMITMENT is all it takes.